The End

I made a decision. This decision brought up more problem, more conflict, more selection, more struggle (sounds almost like Pandora's box). Somehow I opened it.

Sounds deep right? I believe that most of my close friend know what happened to me. Sooner or later, I will have a different life (compare to now), and I don't think I will continue on this blog anymore. There are too much things that is happening yet I can't share it here.

Life is difficult, I always know that. Somehow life always appear more and more difficult every time I meet it/him/perhaps her or HER? Wonder how far more I can travel with this more and more burden keep on input to me (eventually somehow this is my choice to take all those burdens).

There were interesting things happened within this date and the last date I updated, and eventually I hope to update the April Genting trip and June Genting trip, but I think somehow I can't make it already. Feel so sorry, I am still not strong enough.

If I tell you I am not frustrated I am lying you. If i tell you I am not angry I am also lying you. Human's destiny is alone, I don't believe that, but start to follow now. Wonder when only can find the one that fully understand and accept me, and even if i found, then how? Life still as difficult as usual.

Time to say goodbye, thanks to the support for so long, I really appreciate it, but don't really remember it, and it really won't help much in encouraging me also. This is me.

The END

Diary-18/06/2009

Thursday morning I straight away travel back to USJ 21 office. Since office open at 9am, so I wake up late and go. Reach a bit late, have a chat with Mr. Chee, and he tell me the same thing as David told me at Tuesday, that is if earn money earn a bit, then better don't do work and stay at home. (Behind it got a big theory, but I don't know how to express here) After that, I follow Ah To instruction and travel to Puchong to pick up something (first time reach Puchong, really a big task for road idiot like me). The problem appear when I need to travel back to Mont Kiara side. I think I end up follow the wrong road, but finally let me find back Lebuhraya Damansara Puchong, LDP (damn it, they really don't show the sign board for LDP), feel so touched.

After reach site is already lunch time. Ah To tell me that he don't want go out to eat. So I and Eugene sneak out to eat. He suggested that we go to plaza damas. He said that if I got RM100 then can eat TGI Friday. End up I only got RM80, so we choose a restaurant name "Bagel and Coffee Station". It is something like Dounut burger. I ate a set with Dounut (actually the bread name is Bagel, where it looks like dounut, but the concentration is much more higher) and 2 hotdogs. Not bad. Since Eugene have Taylor college student card, end up we get discoun and can buy 1 free 1 for ice blended coffee. When we leave the restaurant, we saw our site project manager sitting there drinking Starbuck Coffee. He seems a bit surprise to see me and Eugene there. Nothing much to say after lunch, just continue to work until almost 8pm, then go back home. Have a nice phone call conversation with Yok San since 18/06 is his birthday.

Diary-17/06/2009

Today work as normal. Just before lunch, the supervisor of Spectrum (a company that help us to core hole in site), Ah Loan, enter our office and start to chat with us. Inside his conversation he got mention about prostitute. They call him "prince", and call Eugene "shareholder", I also don't know why, no dare ask. Anyway this is first time I heard people with real experience in this field sharing this things, since I am such a well behave and high moral kid.

Second attempt to go back early today, end up fail to do so. Escape at 7pm, then rush back home then rush to Sunway Pyramid to watch "Monster vs Allien" with Han Lyn. First time watch 3-D movie. A moderate animation, story line middle rating, full of jokes, added with minor 3-D, still acceptable anyway.

Diary-16/06/2009

Today wake up late a bit, end up reach site almost 9am...... Mr To ask me drive back to Subang Jaya office to return back the pressure gage. A bit far, but is ok. From site drive back to my house is around 20 minutes, then from my house to office another 20 minutes plus. Reach office, return the gages, then say hi to everybody inside office. Being called by dear David Tan to his office. He start to teach me theory of life again, eventhough yesterday night when meet at badminton side, he already lecture me and Han Lyn a bit. Somehow, what he tell me all are so reasonable and useful. A bit regret that I didn't write down what he teach me, since my memory is very low, and will forget soon. Anyway, I somehow remember that, at Monday night, he said that young man need to know how to count and find money, don't always feel shy, kind and generous. He told us that there is one book name "thick face black heart"somemore. At tuesday morning, he also mention a lot of things. Really never met people like him that make me so respect, admire, and everytime also can convince me. Listen to him for 45 minutes, then travel back to site, then eat lunch.After that work. Plan to get back home early, but being "invited" to go site walk by Mr. To when almost 6pm, end up reach home at 8:30pm......

Diary-15/06/2009

Tiring day, sleep at 2am, wake up at 6am. Drive to work, end up reach too early, don't know do what. Have a breakfast at canteen there, then slow slow go up my site. Being summoned by Faizal, accompany him do his work. After that meet Didik, also follow him do his work. After that, plan to continue my coring work, but being asked to fetch Mike go out to buy KFC for all workers, since Mr. Khoriq has won a lottery prices. End up spending up to RM500++ for 150 pieces of chickens. Having a nice lunch and conversation with Mike, Khoriq, and another guy (forget ask his name, tomorrow need to ask see). Still remember last time, I never think of work with even a lots of Malays or Indians, but now end up eating together and always fool around with so many other races people. Life is really so wonderful and unpredictable sometimes.

So, eventually, at this lunch, I have been treat for 2 dinner plates (eating at KFC 1 set, then take away back to office 1 set, but I end up only manage to finish 1 set). Talk about this meal, I have to mention that, this is don't know how many times I have been treat eat since I work here. If not mistaken is already 6-7 meals. I worked in Multi National Company Agilent Technology for 3 months, and I only been treat for 1 meals...... No comment.

After lunch, continue to work. Have a site walk with Mr. Kholiq again, and learn new things again. Before going back, manage to have some conversation to Eugene. Quite enjoy chatting with him, since I think he is the person in site that have most similar thought with me, and we share so many topics.

When drive back home, slept in car. Remain in sleeping mode for almost 20 minutes, so dangerous. After that rush to play badminton, involve in minor accident. This is already the second time accident within 4 days...... That damn blind driver!!!!!!

Diary-12/06/2009

Yawn~

Don't feel like want to sleep at the moment i write this blog, since really sleep too much this few days. This blog has been officially launched since the first day I work, till today. Received some comments, some good and some not so good. Some people said that my content actually repeating. Sad......

Just come to update this week work activities (since only work, no other activity).

Monday (08/06/09):
Last day struggling while waiting my manager come back. Thanks to those who really take care of me when my manager not around, my dear colleague Mike and Ah Keong, foreman Klorik, BGB Andy, Faizal, and Lai, etc......

Tuesday (09/06/09):
Received a sms at 1am, bringing news that Eugene and To will reach at afternoon. Means I have to enter one more meeting before they come back. End up going...... Being scold a bit by main con, but I still can take it. While I am releasing my anger at canteen eating (I never really eat at 10am tea time normally), there I meet my late coming To. So, boss come back, and settle everything. Me did a few wrong things when he not around (as expected also, I think), and he solve it again without blaming me. There goes the end of my first climax in my first career.

Wednesday(10-06-09):
Working......

Thursday(11/06/09):
Working......
Not really can recall back what have i done this two days. Just try to work on those things that my manager ask me to do long times ago but I haven't complete. Have a nice phone call conversation with 金光, the friend that I know in 全升 at end of my first year. We actually didn't meet much, since he is studying in UTM. Most of the time our conversation is inside msn, and this is the first time i phone him. But amazingly, we understand each other so much.

Friday (12/06/09):
Work as usual. My big brother Eugene ask me to go have drink at 10am something, and I reject him, since I have just 2 more level for my job to clear. He then ask me to go to canteen, and tell me that To got something ask him to assign me do. When I reach canteen (it actually takes almost at least 10 minutes for me to travel from the place I am working that time to canteen), he tell me that, Ah To ask me to 忙里偷闲...... (哭笑不得)......
Later when I reach office, To also ask whether I am overload or not, and not dare to assign works to me...... I don't know what have actually happened also. Eventually I am quite slow in working, since i always "ular" when no people see me. Besides, many other people all ask me to learn faster and more hardworking. Anyway, a bit touched for all my colleagues concern also.

Saturday and Sunday diary will be out for a few moments later, that will be another story.

Start next week (15/06/2009), will be the second month in my career. Time to speed up more my effort. My senior and ex-roomate, Goh Lian Chin told me that work in site need to be very hardworking, so I guest I have to spend up more times on working place already. And also, I need to keep fit. time to quit dinner. God bless me!!!

Site is like a DREAM

Site really is like a dream. Anyway, this few days is extreme time for my site career. Since my manager and one of my dependable colleague is not around for 3 days, I have to temporary take over of their job. It is really busy and high pressure time, since I still don't know most of the thing. And I don't have enough time for all my job to be done. Monday will be the last day, can I survive? Can I finish all my tasks at Tuesday when my manager come back? Site is like a dream, I still not used to people call me Ah Ling.
Anyway, thanks to one of my old best friend, I have had a nice and comfort weekend, I will become my motivation to continue on my life.

Diary-04/06/2009

I am back!!! After so many days did not touch my blog, some even asked whether my blog died already. It's ok, just recently a bit busy, and might be a bit hard for me to reorganize what happened so many days ago. Be prepare, since it might be a long one (eventually I want to write yesterday, but end up left my small notice book at car, so can't make it).

Let's talk about my work first. Really feel glad having nice colleague. My manager, Ah To, always there to solve problems, share with me precious experience and teach me a lot of things, patiently. Mike (his Myanmar name is Aung Aung, so cute), looks simple, but actually very smart. Some how I didn't feel that he want to harm me, so still quite enjoy fooling around with him. (He like to play with Eugene when To not around). Finally but not less, Eugene, eventhough he is same age as me (actually is bigger then me la, we born at same year, but he is March, me December), but he take care of me as if I am his little brother. He even tell some other people that I am his younger brother, and really got one people believe. (I don't know whether he find out or not now). Anyway, I am still not used to when they call me "Ling" or "Ah Ling", feel a bit weird.

Now talk about other people beside my Qudotech. I am working at site name "Solaris Dutamas 2", its developer is Sunrise, and main con is BGB. The consultant is SSP and Aston Star. There are still other sub con like Poly and Cobrain (both working on electric), GAE (air con), Langsutra (gas), L.T.Y (box up or plaster, I also not clear, too many to remember). Somehow I have to remember the company, their workers, etc. Quite fun somehow can know a lot of new "friends", which will somehow instantly change into foe when got interception in work. When got boss like M&E coordinator, Site Manager, or other superior want check the site, then all subcon will follow. It is somehow like last ancient time when the emperor want to go out, than got 1 gang of people follow. It is somehow quite fun, and even in meeting, since all so funny and talkative. The atmosphere is really harmony, but it only occur when there are no problems. Site is like that, and I think real life also like that. Beside remember all the companies and other supervisors name, I also need to remember my own workers name. By right there are 60 qutotech workers at site, so I have to remember 60 names...... Very hard for me, especially some of them looks a like. Anyway, after this few days, I manage to recognise around 10 of them.

To become a good site supervisor, I must have good equipment (same like online game). After 1 weeks, I manage to assembly the basic equipment. Safety helmet, handphone bag (bringing a newer handphone, need protection from site), back bag (to bring everything, pants pocket is not enough), marker pens, pens, small note book, ruler tap, camera, water bottle, spray paint, torchlight. Somehow I already start to use to site work, start to mix up with rude word in my conversation, throw rubbish and pee everywhere. Anyway, eventhough my appearance already same to the site, my personality and requirement still haven't reach. I found out that I very hard to stay focus for a long period of time (sometime 5 minutes also cannot stand). This is a very serious problem, sometimes feel myself so stupid and useless, can't remember the things that other people tell or teach me.

For this week, for the first few days, I reach site quite late (after 8:30am), and my morning is usually not much thing to do. Sometimes I even free till phone some friends. And once after lunch, all tasks will appear making me busy till 6pm. As time goes by, the busy time extended. Eventually, for 4th, 5th and 8th of June, is my critical moment. This is because To and Eugene has went to China for company trip, left me and Mike at site, so I have attend all meetings, and appear for all questions. A hard task, somehow I manage to survive for first day, but don't know whether I can hang up for 2 days. I really don't hope other people say that after 2 weeks at site, I can't solve simple tasks. This 2 days I am the last supervisor go back home, after 7:30pm, so a bit short of time also.

A funny fact about site. As all know this Saturday is Agong's brithday, all people should be happy for the holiday. But at site, all people so serious about the holiday, and discussing on how to prevent outside people know our workers working etc, really a different world.

Nowadays, every week I will go play badminton. This past Monday, I and Han Lyn go play again. Me still bad as usual, being lessoned by many people there. One fun thing is, my boss David, he bet RM10 that I can make pumping for 20 times, and I made it, hence I get the RM10.

Life always got happy and sad things. Eventually, when doing this work, I didn't get much support. All coursemate won't enter site, my family also not agree on me having this job. My mother phone me twice and ask me change job, my brother told me better apply for multinational company, my father also don't think working long in site is good. Feel frustrated and confused somehow. I understand all their point actually. But somehow I think working in site can train me into become a complete human, and I think it is harder for other job. I also think sometime, whether I have to work in site everyday, end up go back home dirty and smelly? Or enter a big company, everyday sit office, get company laptop and benefits......